My parents have a mirror in their house that is warped in just the right way to where your body looks elongated just a little…just enough to where you think to yourself, “I look good!” Many people have commented on how much they like looking in the mirror and that it makes them feel good about what they see. It’s weird how just a little tweak of our vision can change our thinking.

I imagine a lot of scenarios for my life – where I could have done something better, or something different, times when I should have said yes…and times when I should have said no (there’s lots of those). At times it’s nice to think how different my life would have been had I done something different, but there’s other times – other thoughts – when I think about them it only makes me feel sad.

I have a lot of regret for things I’ve said and done in my life. And while I have let go of a lot of things, some of them are going to be with me forever. I have yet to find a mirror I can put up to those things that makes them look better – I haven’t been able to find the good in them yet. I wish I could, as Edith Piaf sings so beautifully, have no regrets: “No, nothing of nothing / No! I don’t regret anything / It’s paid for, swept away, forgotten, / I don’t care about the past!”

There’s a great word that I often forget about: content. In an all or nothing society, being content with what you have is almost frowned upon. It seems to me that we’re pushed into wanting or desiring something just because it’s there. There’s no rhyme or reason for having it, but you just have to have it. Contentment is saying that what you have, what you see in front of you is good enough for you. You’re not resigning and giving up, but you’re accepting and proud of what you have.

William Randolph Hearst was a very wealthy newspaper publisher who had an incredible collection of art. The Hearst mansion in northern California is a testament to his insatiable desire for artistic treasures. On one occasion he learned of some artwork he was determined to obtain. He sent his agent abroad to search for the treasure. After months of investigating, the agent reported that the treasure had been found. To further sweeten the find, Hearst learned that the relic wouldn’t cost him a dime. He already owned it. The rediscovered piece was in Hearst’s warehouse with many other treasures that had likewise never been uncrated.

Matthew 5:5 puts it like this: “You’re blessed when you’re content with just who you are – no more, no less. That’s the moment you find yourselves proud owners of everything that can’t be bought.” (MSG)

It takes a lot of time and emotional healing to be content. Every day we have to look at our lives and say, “This is who I am today. And I’m glad that I am.” We can work on our lives and progress to be better, but we first must accept ourselves as we are. Frank McCourt writes in Angela’s Ashes: “He tells me God forgives me and I must forgive myself, that God loves me and I must love myself for only when you love God and yourself can you love all God’s creatures.” Take your time, be patient, and be content with who you are.

.much love. sheth.

Every morning the janitor comes around and empties each trash bin by our little stations at work. It’s the same routine for everyone:
Janitor: “‘Mornin, (employee’s name)”
Employee: “Good morning”
J: “How’s it goin’?”
E: “Good. You?”
J: “I’m doing alright.”
E: “Good.”

This exchange in the office happens at least eight times a morning, five times a week. The same words, same inflection, same actions each and every day, all year long. It gets a little tedious and one really starts to question everyone’s sanity. I can’t help but wonder when someone is going to blow up: “HOW’S IT GOING?! I’LL TELL YOU HOW IT’S GOING!”

*****

Every now and then when watching t.v. I’ll stumble onto The Wheel of Fortune. I love the introductions because they’re so formulaic, but still interesting because you don’t know how the blanks are going to be filled in:

Pat Sajak: “Aye Aye Captain is the answer. Good job. Frank Goodson, is it? Frank’s here from Sacramento, California. It says here you’re a data analyst.”
Frank: “Yeah, I work at a small firm that helps companies to compile and sort out all the information they receive from their clients.”
P: “Neat! And you’re marrtied?”
F: “Yes, twelve years to my beautiful wife Nancy. We have three wonderful children – Harry, Ronnie, and Jessica.”
P: “Sounds like a wonderful family. Why don’t we go for another puzzle?”

All the contestants have great background stories; nicely polished and wholesome, with loving families anxiously waiting in the audience for their victory. But there have to have been times when a contestant didn’t have family to bring so they’re there all alone, or one of them is going through a bitter divorce and has no positive adjectives to describe their spouse.

*****

I bring this up because we all have things we really want to say and talk about – just below the surface we have all this stuff that’s slowly killing us that we need to pour out to someone. Life stuff that we hope someone will ask us about. Ask those questions! Dig deep about relationships, about living situations, about kids. Question the person about their faith, about their health, about their emotions. More than likely the other person really wants to express all this (and more) to you, but they’re afraid. Prod them along and help them get out what they really want to say. Don’t skip along the surface – dive, dive, dive!

.much love. sheth.